“Victorious warriors win first & then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first & then seek to win.”

Sun Tzu 孫子,The Art of War, 6th Century B.C.E.

In “another life” I served alongside individuals in the Special Operations community. Many remain dear friends. I would fight for them & alongside them any day for just cause: freedom for the oppressed and establishment of rule of law where anarchy & abuse reign. I believe this is Biblical & humanly speaking—right.

With that said, I believe that wrongful ethical actions in everyday life, even repetitious, poor micro-decisions, sabotage warriors’ ethical compass, and “bang it up” right before it’s needed most-when the burst of choices present themselves in war. We can nurture this compass and win the ethics battle ahead of time, by training ourselves through the reps, sets, and muscle memory gains of choosing right on the daily basis.

I also think that God’s Divine Spirit cares about us, and even the aspects of mastering the craft of war. One of which is gaining a razor sharp, ethical edge, among non-negotiable tools in our warrior’s kit.

So, here’s a short brief I gave to some teammates to help prepare them to carry out just war & live from that center. My hope is that even as the Marines say, we would “keep our Honor clean”, & also that we’d sharpen our ethical North Star each day. For surely it gets nicked & dulled by the ambiguity inherent in dynamic mission sets, the continuous unit level training preparing to kill, and in actioning death to our targets in the battle-space.

We cultivate our decision-center intentionally. On the job and off the job. In the morning and at night. When we make our bed & when we wash the dishes. When we show patience with kids, and when we remember the disabled and burdened. Seneca said, “No man was ever wise by chance.” Ethical decisions spring from preparation, they spring from desert times of knowing ourselves, and public strain when we enter the marketplace. We have to become hungry to “buy the truth and not to sell it.” I’ve found that peer mentors, and especially elders, have been a crucial source for gaining wisdom and learning to cherish it.

The impacts of high-octane operational living can lead even the strongest to feeling like we are careening into oblivion and losing ourself. When we sin, are betrayed, or mortgage our own integrity through selfish choices, sadly there is a steep price paid which can be tough to recover from. Some never recover from the free fall. Premature death, and self-harm, is sometimes the end state when ethical decision-making is ignored due to convenience, or the hubris we fall prey to when we appear to have mastered the deadly craft of war. But life is far too precious for the free fall to rob anymore of my brothers and sisters. They have given the best years of their youth to be sheep dogs for the Nation. We need them. And You, if you’re scanning this, because you are the hero your children and nation need! Even if you only think you’ve done your job, or were second rate compared to a brother or sister who didn’t make it. Ultimately our warriors are loved as “Robbie” and “Sarah” -people with names and elementary schools they attended and grandparents & blood types and unique gifts, and interests beyond war. Loved not for what they do, but who they are before & after war entered their life.

This issue is easy to write about…and read about, but the deepest insights probably come over a cup of coffee with a true friend, or out on rugged mountains, a desert or even on a surfboard in silence on a weekend in Bali like Charlie Keating would do…I think the simplest word for homing in to the ethical center is Grace. We give it to ourselves and we receive it. And its counterpart is “Love which covers over a multitude of sins.”

Much love.

Kit

Blog Author: LCDR Kristian Carlson is a Navy Chaplain. He has served alongside Marines, Sailors, Soldiers, & Special Forces, and has completed three deployments. In 2020, the Navy sent him to Duke University’s Divinity School to earn a specialized Master’s Degree, ThM, in Pastoral Care, where he focused his studies on challenges facing Active Duty personnel, Veterans and their families. His specific areas of interest include care for persons with Complex Trauma, strategies for healing from PTSD, Moral Injury, & mild TBI. A key personal mission of his is to leverage the strengths of faith-based Veteran Service Organizations as strategic partners to chaplains, the VA, and the DoD in their ongoing resiliency & suicide prevention initiatives. He is married to his Chilean sweetheart, Damaris. They have two young children, who are the delight of their hearts.